Friday, September 5, 2008

Fatally Attracted

Let me just preface this by saying that I am quite late to the party on this. Like, over half a decade late. But, I just watched Fatal Attraction, and it is fucking AMAZING.

Reason 1: It doesn't hold back

Anyone who knows me knows that this movie is right up my alley. Along with Basic Instinct and Single White Female, it is one of the seminal oversexed crazy murderess films of the early nineties (also, for some reason I lump Showgirls in with this genre too, even though plotwise they're very different. But you know they work, right?) These movies pull no punches, and let their stars be as batshit crazy as they wanna be, resulting in (mostly) unintended hilarity.

And Fatal Attraction possibly takes the cake. For instance, when Michael Douglas wants to end the affair, Glenn Close doesn't want him to leave. In a lesser movie, her character might threaten blackmail, or cuss him out, but not our girl. Don't want him to leave? SLIT YOUR WRISTS AND RUB YOUR WRIST BLOOD ON HIS FACE! Then he has to stay!

Or perhaps in the most famous scene, whats a girl to do when the object of her insanity changes his numbers and hightails it out of the city to hide in the country with his family? How's our girl supposed to leave crazy messages anymore. Why, resulting to the oldest trick in the book re: getting an ex lover's attention: boil his 4 year old daughter's pet rabbit on the family stove and leave it for his wife to find! That's sure to remind your lover why he should come back to you! Right...?

Reason 2: Glenn Close is....a sex symbol?

Yes, I know that she was much younger when this was made, and yes I know the character is supposed to be sexy. Maybe its because the later era Glenn is fresh on my mind, but I just don't understand how this woman could ever have been seen as a sexual icon, albeit a walnutsbonkersapeshit one, but an icon nonetheless. Its like the director was just like to Glenn "Oh yeah...shes very sexual. You'll be the new Helen of Troy!" and then realized that...fuck...its Glenn Close. So, they just told the hair person to tease the fuck out of her hair in hopes that it would distract people. But, I think the choice of Glenn Close as Alex Forrest works. Her face carries crazy surprisingly well.

Reason 3: French Cut Panties

Seriously, theres a lot of them.

So, in conclusion, SEE THE MOVIE IF YOU HAVEN'T YET! And if you haven, rewatch it. Watch it with Basic Instinct and Single White Female all in one sitting. Alone. In the dark. While crying and listening to opera and alternately turning the light on and off with a vacant look on your face. Please? Seriously. Watch it. I won't be ignored!

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